April 1st: HAPPY BIRTHDAY Kirollos
Kirollos is a great guy. We used to be really good friends in high school, especially towards the end of highschool. I remember he always used to give me rides home when I broke my foot. During my gap year, I lost contact with lots of my friends from high school. Everyone went on to do their own things, and we started drifting. I specifically remember talking to Kirollos about friendships after highschool when we were in high school. I told him that there are friends that you don't need to talk to for years, and you can just pick up where you left off. Kirollos disagreed and said it would be hard to maintain a friendship like that. The answer lies somewhere in the middle, there are some friends I can't pick back up with, because I am not the same person I was in highschool and neither are they. But Kirollos is still one of those friends that I can pick back up even after long durations and still have a great connection with. When we talked it was it felt like home.Kirollos is indeed a good friend.
To now and forever
- Kirollos
Reflection:
I have this notion that I'm better than some people, that I'm well off. That I know something that no else does. It causes me to belittle people with through conversation. Often times it is never explicit, but the undertone exists, because I believe it on some level. I'm sure people can pick up on it as well when it happens. I don't think its a good thing, I have so much room to grow. I think deep inside I want to paint a picture that I'm smart, or that I have some special ability to do things. I'm afraid that I'm just a poser, I'm not really that smart, or very capable. I've been lucky in my circumstances and the people that helped me along the way. I've said some version of this in my journal, but it seems like I'm very forgetful with this. I need to stay humble, not because its a bad personality trait but because it is the truth. The truth being, the fortune I was blessed with as well as the great people I'm surrounded by play the biggest part in my success. In fact I may be the only person dragging myself down.