Time is flying by

I was at my little brothers graduation yesterday, he’s 3 years younger than me. I didn’t realize how much time had passed since then, and it’s moving even faster. This week went by so fast, I swear It was 2025, like yesterday and now its June. WE ARE HALFWAY THROUGH THE YEAR.

I caught up with some of my friends that I haven’t seen in years, some people haven’t changed one bit, but others you can’t even tell they’re the same person. I got an opportunity to apologize to one of my high school teachers, for always leaving class and never coming back. I was glad to hear that she didn’t take it personally .

There’s nothing like the feeling of home, I got food all the time, and I just feel this overwhelming sensation of belonging. I was walking through university and everyone’s face looks so wonderfully familiar. I hung out with family and friends and it felt amazing.

ASIDE

Something I wanted to address that I haven’t gotten the time to write down is why I’m not writing as much anymore, which is intentional. I felt like everyday I’d come home after work, and then I’d write about the day, even if the day was boring, when I begin to write about the day I think about the small moments that made it fun. That’s all well and good, but what I realized is that writing is a pseudo-action. It’s the step you take before taking the action, like an intermediary, but it’s not the point of my life. Writing was somehow filling the void of moving ahead in life, when I was only writing about moving ahead in life. Writing is beautiful but it is abstract, it doesn’t really exist, and that is the death of all action. I want to live a life of action, one where it is not just the ideas that I write that people remember me for, but for the actual actions I took in life.

Maybe this has happened to you, where instead of taking the most uncomfortable path of action, you take the adjacent route where it feels like you are moving ahead, but you are only fooling yourself.

I watched a video about the book Sun of Steel by Mishima that sounded pretty close to what I said, his main thing was that he was really good at writing, but that is itself not action, and it deeply worried him